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Yahoo

A Hollywood Legend Passes. . .

by Uncle Awesome on May 9, 2009

An artists rendering of Mickey Carroll in 1974

An artists rendering of Mickey Carroll (or really any midget) in 1978

Today we mourn the loss of Mickey Carroll, he was 89.

Let’s see, why was he famous?  I know I have it around here somewhere. . . . Oooooooh, wait a second. . . . Seriously. . . . Yahoo actually reported this???

He was the last remaining Munchkin from The Wizard Of Oz? Is there anyone other than the Wicked Witch of the West who gives a midget’s shit about this?  OK, maybe Warwick Davis (Who you may better know as Willow, who is currently in preproduction for a movie called Short Fellas. No, I’m not making this up.  Seriously, it’s called Short Fellas. I know, I know, he’s a midget, it’s a funny name).

Do you want to know what Mickey Carroll did AFTER The Wizard of Oz? I’m sure he has a long full body of work (pun intended) that warranted The Associated Press and Yahoo jumping at the chance to report this.  NOPE, that’s it! Wizard of Oz: 1939, Long Life Being Mistaken as a Child Wondering If There Is Really A God: 1939-2009.

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At The Forefront of Science

by Uncle Awesome on April 15, 2009

 

Will you marry me?

Will you marry me?

Yahoo can always raise the intellectual bar with fascinating studies, like this one.   People who smile in yearbook pictures are more likely to stay married??? Are you kidding me?  Somewhere real scientists are getting paid to go to work and do this???  Where do I sign up for this job?  Am I underqualified?  Let’s see the basis for said study. . . 

“Maybe smiling represents a positive disposition towards life,” said study leader Matthew Hertenstein

Ho-ly shit, why in God’s name didn’t I think of that.  No wonder you’re the study leader, Matt.  You, sir, are a credit to the entire scientific community.  But let me try to fully comprehend what your years of research are saying.  People who smile (ok, I’m with you so far), may be happier than people who don’t smile.  Admittedly, I have never taken quantum physics, but allow me to retort. . .  Your study is farts!

WTF!

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