MSN

BE CAREFUL! This food will KILL you!

This is just fucking ridiculous.  How MSN gets away with such a misleading title is beyond me. 

“America’s Top-10 Riskiest Foods”

Right!?!  So of course I’m thinking:

1) Bloomin Onion at Outback

2) 4 by 4 Animal Style from In N Out

3) Anything from the Cheesecake Factory – I mean, it’s called the fucking cheesecake factory! (wtf)

But NO.  The “riskiest” foods in America are instead: Leafy Greens, Eggs, Tuna, Oysters, Potatoes, Cheese, Ice Cream, Tomatoes, Sprouts, and Berries.  That’s right, berries. 

Suuuurrrreeee. 

Of course, the article is supposed to be discussing the fact that these ten foods have the highest likelihood of contamination, not the highest gonna-kill-you-in-3-years-artery-clogging-fat.

But here’s the catch….WE NEVER HAVE OUTBREAKS BECAUSE OF FOOD.  Name one.  Name one time this country shut down, closed up shop because we had a food outbreak.  Name one! 

I’ve probably seen some dickhead newscaster tell me on the evening news that “beef’s been recalled” or some bullshit like that.  Know what I do?  GO BUY BEEF!  Nothing ever happens people, NOTHING!

WTF!

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