by Commodore on May 18, 2010
This would be more productive
I blame you, society. Every single one of you U.S. Weekly reading, E! News watching, pop news eating people. Bristol Palin should not be paid to speak if the decision for a speaker was between her and one of the jive speaking gentleman in Airplane! But alas, my bell curve theory holds ture. It’s easy to be rich if you’re incredibly brilliant (Steve Jobs, Kurt Angle) or incredibly worthless (Bristol Palin, Glenn Beck).
Bristol Palin has signed with a speakers bureau for a tidy sum of between $15,000 and $30,000 per speech.
Don’t adjust your screens. No, I didn’t fall asleep on the number ‘0′ on my keyboard. No, that comma shouldn’t be a period. Yes, that is in U.S. dollars. Let’s say you work 2,000 hours in a year and get paid $85,000. Then let’s say Bristol speaks for an hour and makes $30,000. Now let’s just say that I threw up in my mouth a little bit.
Her teen pregnancy and the birth of her son Tripp, resulted in millions of Americans discussing the issues surrounding teen pregnancy. Bristol has since gone on to become a Teen Ambassador for the Candie’s Foundation, and speaks about pregnancy prevention, abstinence, faith and life.
Yes, who else to teach us about pregnancy prevention, abstinence, faith and life other than a spoon fed teenage girl who got knocked up by a gay dude? Yeah, let’s pay her boat loads of money. You fucking people are retarded. No, that wasn’t a knock at you, Trig.
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by Commodore on August 17, 2009
Levi, let's take a test.
If ever there was someone the world doesn’t need to read about again, it’s Levi Johnston, but thank God there’s US Weekly to the rescue! Usually when someone is a respectful person, he is said to have “a good head on his shoulders.” Based on this interview, I am not even sure Levi Johnston has a head on his shoulders.
Levi Johnston says he may pose nude if the price is right. “It depends on the money, man,” says Johnston, an aspiring actor and model.
Huh? There are so many things in that last quote that make my head want to explode like a Femm Bot. Pose nude? Actor? Model? Jesus Christ. When did this fucking happen?
“It’s gotta be right for that,” continues Johnston in an interview with Bravo’s Andy Cohen via Skype from his hometown of Wasilla, Alaska.
A Skype interview with Bravo is to interviews as an ostrich is to “birds I wish I could be”.
But as far as “cougars” go, Sarah Palin is “not my favorite, no,” he says.
Levi. She’s your kid’s grandmother. I hope she’s not your favorite. In this photo dictionary I am looking at, I am surprised that I don’t find a photo of Levi Johnston for the entry, “tact”.
Now that Palin has stepped down as governor, Johnson quips he’s “thinking about” making a run for her former position. “Maybe one day. It sounds like a lot of fun,” Johnston says before signing off to go sheep hunting.
Earth to Levi, you would pose nude for cash and you just basically said that you would bang your kid’s grandma. I am not sure you are socially responsible to mop up spills in aisle 6. Plus, anyone who thought being a governor of a state would be fun, right before he stated his wishes to discharge a firearm at a virtually immobile peaceful animal, used to have to stand in the corner and miss nap time while the school notified his parents that their kid might be retarded.
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by Commodore on April 9, 2009
Palin/Johnston family hero
Levi Johnston is upset because people think he and his family are white trash. The Palin’s are convinced that they are not white trash. Well then how do you explain a sentence like this:
But a war of words is escalating between her [Palin's]camp and Levi Johnston, the father of Tripp, the baby Palin’s teenage daughter, Bristol, had in late December.
That sentence couldn’t infer more “white trashedness” if it was a styrofoam cup on top of a landfill. And if that isn’t enough, Levi has a sister named, Mercede. Mercede? It’s a Mercedes. Now you know why your stripper friends, Lexus, and Candy make fun of you so much, Mercede.
(sigh)
Why is any of this even being reported on? Who fucking cares????? Sarah Palin clearly likes guns and reproducing when her body might not be ready for it and it seems as if her daughter has at least one of those traits. End of story.
For the good of the country, we should have never known that Sarah Palin even existed, let alone hearing where her granddaughter’s bastard father slept 5 months ago. Honestly. WTF.
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by Big Lou Al Timber on March 11, 2009
Don't Touch Me Bitch
ESPN Palin and her douche bag boyfriend Levi have called it quits. Let’s see, FUCKING TOLD YOU SO! Remember when this brilliant sound bytes was disposed upon us by Sarah the GILF:
”Bristol and the young man she will marry are going to realize very quickly the difficulties of raising a child, which is why they will have the love and support of our entire family,”
You sure about that?
Guess again Palin, guess the fuck again. Turns out your slut of a daughter and her shitty kid “Trip” are going to be living with you for a while. Hopefully she won’t interfere with your hockey games.
Thank god you chose to keep the child, kid’s probably going to grow up to be a star, just like daddy.
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