Break

Sometimes ignoring doesn't work.

Since the 9th century BC, scientists and psychologists alike, have proven that the nagging abilities of a female is enough to wreak havoc on a male’s brain, driving him to bug out to levels that even war has not driven him to. But this is another level completely.

A man jumped into a fast-flowing river because he couldn’t take his wife’s nagging anymore. The Chinese truck driver, known as Zhou, and his wife were on a ferry on the Yangtze River when it all became too much for him, the Chongqing Evening Post reports.

Oh come on. How bad could the nagging have been? There must be some misunderstanding. I’m sure the guy fell overboard accidentally. These things happ-

Members of the ship’s crew saw the man suddenly run out of his cabin with his hands covering his ears, and shouting: “I can’t stand it any longer.” They initially thought he was suffering from an ear injury and went to help him but found he was unhurt. “While we were still puzzling over the this, his wife ran up and continued nagging him,” said a crewmate. “The husband covered his ears again and said: ‘I need a break’ before jumping over the side into the rushing river.

Jesus Christ! Think about this for one moment. The man was so fed up with his wife’s nagging that he jumped off a fucking boat in the middle of the night because he needed a break. A break. This man’s only solace from getting an ear full of an “estrogen fueled expectation lambasting” was plunging into the waters of the Yangtze River, where as one crew member put it,

“The possibility of survival can be zero.”

The dude needed a break from the continuous torment of his wife, and his choice for that sliver of peace was almost guaranteed death. Either this guy’s fuse made The Incredible Hulk’s look like a zip line or this woman asked more questions than a 3-year-old devil child who just learned the word “Why”.

However, later that night, police found the man who had managed to swim about 2km across across the broad river. “I felt I was dying, but even that’s better than my wife’s nagging,” he reportedly told the police.

2km?! Dying was better than being nagged? Lady, I don’t know what you have been riding your husband about but unless he wipes his ass with towels and throws them on the bed, you might want to let some shit slide. Sure he could use some new shoelaces, trim his ear hair, floss more, lose a pound or two, and not get so much water on the bathroom floor, but cut the guy some slack.

The couple were reunited the following morning at the local police station where Zhou’s wife promised to give up her habit of nagging him.

That a girl.