by Commodore on January 27, 2011
Let's be glad the guy wasn't a rhino
This is just your typical, man-shits-on-floor-and-is-arrested story. You can move along. Nothing to see here.
The incident took place when the 45-year-old man was visiting a shop in the town of Finspång. When nature called, the man asked a store employee if he could use the toilet, the local Norrköpings-Tidning newspaper reported. But the store employee explained that health regulations prohibited customers from using the store toilet, news which prompted the man to take drastic measures. “He pulled down his pants, squatted on the floor and pooped,” the 21-year-old female cashier said in court during the 45-year-old’s trial, according to the newspaper. The cashier explained further that the man proceeded to insult her while he relieved himself on the floor of the store. After he’d finished his business, the 45-year-old left the store, snatching some candy on the way, and leaving behind a pile of excrement and his dirty undies, according to the cashier.
That whole scene is hysterical. Picturing the guy swearing at the girl while shit is coming out of his ass is classic. I wonder if his insults took a break when he got to the rea——-lly difficult part of his shit.
Dropping a deuce and stealing some candy? Now that’s gangster. Had he wiped his ass with a t-shirt from the store, that would have taken the cake.
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by Commodore on March 29, 2010
Seriously
It what seems to be a reoccurring theme here, I run into more stories which nail home the theory in my title, one hammer swing at a time. Or in this case, one toy gun at a time.
A father tried to give his 11-year-old daughter a time-out, but she ended up getting charged with a misdemeanor.
Around 9:30 p.m. March 24, the girl and her 7-year-old brother got into a fight over who got to sit in a certain chair, according to an Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Office arrest report. The father ended up escorting the girl to her room.
The man stood in the hallway watching her, making sure she wouldn’t try to run away out her bedroom window, the report said. The girl grabbed a toy gun and threw it, striking her father in the head and causing him to bleed from a laceration on his scalp.
The girl was charged with domestic battery and is due in juvenile court May 5.
Nice, buddy. You called the cops on your 11 year-old daughter because you couldn’t dodge her throwing a toy gun and it cut your scalp. Not your face, your scalp. I’m sure Major Richard Winters and Sergeant John Basilone would still respect you, and I’m sure your daughter isn’t going to grow up with any “daddy issues” whatsoever. They say that men end up going after a girl that is most like his mother. If this is the same for women, then her and Clay Aiken/PeeWee Herman hybrid of a husband is going to be in for a fun life.
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by Commodore on February 4, 2010
Clear as day
Can’t we just do away with a few people here and there to weed out the sludge? Populations can’t keep growing forever. At some point, some people are gonna have to go. Let’s start with…her.
A 51-year-old Crestview woman who had been warned about calling 911 for non-emergency reasons was arrested Jan. 26 after the fourth call in 90 minutes. She was calling to report that her husband had taken her cell phone and would not return it, according to her arrest report.
You read that correctly. She wasn’t 15. She was 51, with a presumably fully developed brain. Talk about bad problem solving skills. That would be like calling in a demolition specialist, a quarry digging company, and an excavator to plant some tomatoes in your garden.
When an Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Office deputy went to their home after the third call, he attempted to call the number for the phone that had been reported as stolen. He heard it ringing in the room, he wrote in his report. At that time, deputies told her not to call again about the phone.
She never bothered to actually call her own cell phone. That should be ground for a public execution for wasting the police’s time.
After she called again, she was arrested for abusing the 911 system. When she was searched prior to being placed in the patrol car, the phone was located in her jacket pocket.
Ready. Aim. Fire.
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by Commodore on January 8, 2010
Even the bears have had enough
Here in the west, being of “unpopular” ethnic blood, I consider myself a quite tolerant person (although tall Chinese people make me run for the hills). You understand things differently when you’ve experienced the shittier side of an ethnic joke and you are aware of different global customs. Well, I have just reached the point where I think strict Sharia Law needs Harry Stamper to fly to it, drill 200 feet down into the heart of it, and detonate an atomic bomb, because this is getting ridiculous.
A British woman on a break in Dubai went to police after being raped – but she was arrested for having illegal sex.
Double edged swords are great when giving a life lesson but the “Broken glass studded dipped in AIDS” is a bit much.
The devastated couple were last night understood to be on bail awaiting trial and have had their passports confiscated. They could be jailed for up to six years if found guilty of the illicit sex charge.
That is not a line from a movie script.
The ordeal of the rape victim, a pretty Muslim of Pakistani descent, began after she joyfully accepted a marriage proposal from her boyfriend during a three-day New Year break. She admitted drinking too much afterwards as they celebrated at Dubai Marina’s luxurious Address Hotel – and passed out in a ladies’ loo. The waiter is said to have followed her into the toilets and raped her while she was semi-conscious. Her fiancé was initially unaware of the attack and helped her to their room, where they slept until the next day.
That whole situation seems fishy. She goes to the bathroom, passes out, gets raped and then….did she walk out? Did he go in and find her asleep on the toilet with her pants around her ankles and think nothing of it? (Note to self: Don’t blackout in Dubai.)
But the horror of the rape came back to her when she woke – and the pair went to Jebel Ali police station to report it. Yet unsympathetic cops immediately quizzed them about breaking the emirate’s severe decency rules, which contain elements of Sharia law. Medics were said to have shunned rape case procedures – but made sure they obtained a blood sample from the woman to prove she had been drinking.
That’s like a cop saying, “I see you have been in a horrific car accident, but here’s a ticket for that broken tail light, because broken tailights are illegal.” But hang on a second, how were they arrested for illegal sex?!
“She was trying to report the rape but soon realised the policemen were more interested in how often she has sex with her boyfriend. “They even asked if she did just normal sex or anything else in bed.” Her attacker, who is understood to be Syrian, is believed to have denied rape. He claimed the Briton consented but has also been charged with “illegal sex”.
(Note to self: Take the box of condoms and bottle of whiskey out of packed suitcase and burn the airplane ticket you just bought to Dubai. Tell your girlfriend that getting drunk and boning each other ontop of the world’s tallest building and becoming part of the half-mile high club is not a good idea. Be thankful for the life you have.)
WTF.
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