We Are A Country of Fat Bastards

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I thought I believed in Universal Healthcare until I saw this. New rule, Universal Healthcare for all those who don’t eat at the Heart Attack Grill. Are you fucking kidding me?

“No I am not a doctor, legally.” No, you are not a doctor, actually. Why do people hate Americans in general? Well that can be debated but I assure you that stories like this certainly don’t help our cause abroad.

Hey asshole, your restaurant is not there for the person who occasionally wants to splurge on a greasy meal. Your clientelle resembled baby hippos more than they did humans. But you sure do know how to strike the heart of a fat, econimcally marginalized dude, have half naked chicks running around serving them their death traps. Bravo, my friend.

In all seriousness, I sure as shit can’t wait to eat there! I’m getting a quadruple for sure! I’m so glad I’m not fat.