HAHAHA You Suck Mexico!

A Billionaire in Mexico? What The Fuck?

You’re not seriously upset about this are you Mexico? I mean, for fuck sake you landed a guy on the Richest People on the Planet List! And he’s not a chili farmer or tequila distiller.

Nope, he’s a fucking druglord. Tony fucking Montana, only, Mexico’s version so he probably has a pencil sized dick and terrible breath.

Joaquin “El Chapo” Guzman Loera came in a #701 on Forbes Magazine’s list of the world’s billionaires, and now Mexico is pissed about it.

Um, why so mad? Oh, you want people in your country to make the list without selling drugs? You want a “legitimate” billionaire? News Flash Mexico: NOTHING you have is Legitimate.

I’ve spent my fair share of time gracing your beautiful beaches, I’ve drank way too many sol’s and pacifico’s. Fuck, once I took a jellyfish to the chest in your polluted waters right after playing 36 holes of golf next to a lake filled with human shit. You’re not legitimate, not even fucking close.

I even spent a night in one of Cabo’s fine jails, well, actually I spent an hour before my buddies bailed me out with a few hundred bucks, so fuck your fucking legitimate claims.

Here’s a tip: Get some infrastructure. Get some rules. Build an ecomomy that survives around more than one fucking individual, then come talk to us.