Rick Reilly, Only 15 Years Late On This One, Buddy

Like writing a groundbreaking article on this new device called the internet in Wired Magazine, Rick Reilly did something equally retarded by writing an article about Beer Pong in ESPN The Magazine. Rick, every person reading this magazine knows what beer pong is. Everyone that doesn’t is 12 and reading their dad’s ESPN the Magazine.

Seriously, this was one of the worst articles I have ever read in my entire life. I didn’t learn one thing other than the fact that a bunch of pussies play at the World Series of Beer Pong. 4 out of 10 cups are filled with water? WTF?! What is this? That’s like war with timeouts. Oh wait, we do that now too, don’t we? Israel will bomb you but then stop to let humanitarian aid in and then bomb the U.N building anyway.

Anyway, I digress. Where was I? Oh yeah, reading Rick Reilly’s “Have You Guys Seen Girls Wearing These Bikini Thingies on the Beach This Summer???” article.

“It should be noted that the final was filled with honor. Nobody mentioned anybody’s sister or flashed unwelcome appendages. That’s good. All this bush league stuff will have to go if we’re going to take beer pong to the next level: the Olympics.” What the fuck are you talking about Rick? Bush league? It’s fucking beer pong!! A game created at seedy fraternity houses to get college chicks drunk so they are easier to bang…It’s called “bush” league for a reason.