San Diego, Where Absolutely Nothing Happens

You know you live in real life “Pleasantville” when your city’s news website thinks this story needed to be shared with the world. What happened, there were no stories of people buying sun tan lotion to report about? Only in San Diego do you call the fucking cops when you’re smashed and can’t find your way home….AND THEY COME AND LOOK FOR YOU, WITH THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!!!! Time to rob me a bank in SD.

And how low on the reporting poll are you when this is the story you get to write about?

Shitty Writing Intern: Hey boss, I was thinking about writing an Op-Ed on the affect the Obama administration is going to have on the energy sector in coal rich areas.

Boss of a San Diego New Station Who Knows That People in San Diego Don’t Give A Fuck About Reality: What administration? No, you know what…I heard some ridiculous story on the police scanner about a guy in a trashcan with a bunch of screw drivers or something. Write about that!

Shitty Writing Intern: Awesome.