Oh Good

Forget the tattoo! That is the biggest belly button I have ever seen.

You’d expect something better out of Austria. Something more in depth, I would imagine. I don’t know. Studying lint seems like something a guy who looks like Kevin Youkilis would study. But alas, our boredom has taken us to new heights.

Georg Steinhauser discovered that there is a certain type of body hair responsible for directing lint into the navel. The researcher spent three years studying 503 pieces of schmutz from his own belly button, then published his conclusions in the journal Medical Hypotheses under the title, “The nature of navel fluff.”

Dude…(I rub my eyes incessantly)…what the fuck are you doing? 3 years? Who is funding this study? Schmutz? I didn’t know lint had an alias. Fluff? I didn’t know it had 2. The nature of naval fluff? Come on. Nothing interested you more than that along the way, Georg? I don’t think there is anything LESS interesting than stomach lint. You could have studied the leg movement of a sleeping paraplegic and it wouldn’t have been less interesting.

Then again, every time I do see that little ball of fun in my belly button I think, “Now how did YOU get in there, silly guy?” Well thanks to Georg, it turns out that it got in there because my belly button is “cleaner and more hygienic” than the average belly button. Great.

Oh, what the fuck am I even talking about…