Guys, They’re DEAD, It Doesn’t Matter!

Ranking how rich dead people are = POINTLESS

I’m sure I didn’t just read that Forbes tracks dead people’s money. Because that would be ridiculous. Utterly fucking ridiculous. But no….

“Forbes magazine’s ninth annual list of top-earning dead celebrities was unveiled Wednesday…”

That’s right, a list of dead people that make billions more dollars than I do, but they’re dead. How is this even remotely relevant? I mean, these people ARE NOT LIVING!

“Late French fashion designer Yves Saint Laurent debuted in the No. 1 spot with an estate that earned $350 million in the year after his death from brain cancer in June 2008.”

Hey…Guys…Yves is dead! Discussing his billions of dollars is irrelevant! This is like jotting down a list of guys in heaven that are sleeping with more virgins than I am. Or tracking whose farm on facebook has more cabbages. It’s fucking irrelevant! Who cares! Because guess what, if he’s dead he can’t spend any of that money!!! Are we serious here!?!

Of course we are: “To place on this year’s list, “delebs” — industry speak for dead celebrities — had to earn at least $6 million between October 1, 2008, and October 1, 2009.”

Stop it. Stop it right there. What industry refers to “delebs”….seriously. Come on.

WTF!