Um Yeah, No Shit

by Big Lou Al Timber on September 29, 2009

"possibly" overdosed on cocaine...

"possibly" overdosed on cocaine...

I now love the New Your Medical Examiner, specifically for his ability to dumb shit down to a level so fucking obvious, my hampster could comprehend.  And for the record, I’m not sure I would have put the pieces together on this one had CNN not stepped in.  Thank GOD for CNN.com. 

“Adam “DJ AM” Goldstein’s death last month was an accident caused by “acute intoxication” from a combination of cocaine and prescription drugs, the New York medical examiner said Tuesday.”

Ah HA!  I totally get it now!  Seriously…

Let me remind you of a couple things:

1) DJ AM was a….D.J.  I mean, have you seen Samantha Ronson?  Or any other DJ for that matter?  Seriously…

2) He dated Nicole Richie

and the real kicker

3) “Goldstein’s body was found August 28 in his New York apartment with a crack pipe nearby and a half bag of crack cocaine and prescription drugs in the home, a police source told People.com.”

I mean coooooommmme oooooonnnnn!  You didn’t really need to “examine” this did you? 

“The medical examiner said Goldstein, a self-described crack cocaine addict, died from an accidental overdose due to the combined effects of cocaine, Oxycodone, Vicodin, Ativan, Klonopin, Xanax, Benadryl and Levamisole, a drug used to cut cocaine.”

KEY WORDS: self-described.  He called himself a fucking coke head.  Call me pig-headed, but I don’t think that needs any explanation what-s0-ever!  Dude did a boatload of drugs and killed himself!  End of story!

But importantly, CNN clears up any further confusion with this nugget: “The 36-year-old DJ and entrepreneur had 11 years of sobriety before his death.”

Really?  WTF!

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