Um, Can We Have Some Universal Healthcare, Please?

From Blue Shield, with love

Ok folks. Enough is enough. We need to work this thing out so that a citizen living in the most powerful (arguable) country in the world can have her hospital bill covered because she went to the ER when she WOKE UP IN A POOL OF BLOOD THAT HAD BEEN FLOWING FROM HER NIPPLE.

Doctors found a tumor and initially told Rosalinda Miran-Ramirez, she had breast cancer. A biopsy later proved that assumption false; the tumor was benign.

Well thank God for that. I can’t imagine why an insurance company wouldn’t cover that bill.

Documents from Blue Shield indicate the company had reviewed the case and determined Miran-Ramirez “reasonably should have known that an emergency did not exist.”

Yeah, what kind of an asshole goes to the hospital when they wake up in a blood soaked shirt from an open orfice on their chest? Fuckin cry baby!

WTF Blue Shield! There wasn’t a severed horse’s head in her bed. It wasn’t like her chafed nipples were bleeding because she ran a marathon. Her nipple was flowing blood. She should have had a police escort to the hospital and the president should have been notified.

Blue Shield, what Middle Ages home remedy book do you guys own that tell us what liquids to gargle to get rid of “bloody geyser nipple”?

Gosh, this country make s ton of sense sometimes.