Gay Penguins get rights faster than Gay Humans

by Commodore on December 17, 2008

In quite possibly the biggest “Bro, WTF” shoulder shrug and eye squint to date, it seems as if gay penguins are being given the right to raise their own baby penguin. Is that for real??? I am not gay bashing, nor am I homo-phobic, and I think that gay couples can adopt. Go for it! But those motherfucker “gaynguins” were pulling the Indiana Jones switcheroo trick with mother penguins but instead of using a bag of sand for the idol, they were using the rock for the egg that was on their feet. That is gangster! And that is kidnapping!! How in the fuck, are zoo keepers going to now condone the stealing of eggs from a mother penguin? I don’t care if they consider her ‘inexperienced’!

People were up in arms that the “Gaynguins” were being ostracized and not allowed to be “surrogate fathers”. Surrogate fathers? Get the fuck out here! This is not human society, folks! Not every species HAS to live by our rules. Nature was doing juuuuuust fine before we came along and completely fucked it up.

So how this surrogate father thing works is that they STEAL an egg from a heterosexual couple. Are these same people cool with that? Could you imagine THAT happened in society?

- Ma’am, since this is your first baby and you’ve never done this before, we are going to take it and give it to Tom, Dick and Harry. They’re gonna be great dads! Thanks!

Some bonehead at the zoo said, “It wasn’t fair to stop them becoming parents and keep them apart from all the other birds just because of the way nature has made them.” Sir, it’s also not fair that your child wasn’t sold on the black market.

Last 5 posts by Commodore

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