Why Are You Telling Me This?

If this happened to the Mona Lisa, then tell me.

I’m begnning to the think that news agencies sensationalize things just so they trick me into reading them. For instance, the title of this article is: “Frustrated Russian Throws Cup At Mona Lisa”

Goodness. This immediately makes me think that the Mona Lisa is damaged and will never be the same again….Oh that tricky Reuters:

“The woman threw an empty cup at the Mona Lisa, but there was no damage as the cup smashed when it hit the screen protecting the painting,” said Louvre spokesman David Madec.

Phew. I bet that small screen barely withstood the velocity of the tumbling orb that was on a trajectory to be the death stroke to Mona Lisa’s smile. What high drama in Paris!

The Mona Lisa, which is protected by a bullet-proof screen, is one of the most prized works in the Louvre and was seen by some 8.5 million visitors last year.

Hey Reuters, WTF! Bulletproof glass?! Why are you reporting this, then? Unless she threw a cup made out of grenade, you don’t need to tell us this. You might as well write an article, “Enraged Giant Bird Slams Into Small Building” and then write, “but the adult Blue Jay exploded on impact because it ran into a building that is made of steel. No one in the building even noticed the bird strike.”