Top 5 Thoughts A Guy Has While Riding A Subway

These are deep thoughts. Hope you can comprehend.

Ok, we’re gonna give you 10 today. We’d rather under promise and over deliver.

1) That guy is big. But does he have a bigger dick than me? I don’t know. But I know that I have a hotter girlfriend. Unless of course, that is his girlfriend sitting over there, because I would definitely bang the shit out of her before I banged my girlfriend.

2) If I had to fuck every chick on this car, who would I fuck last…That old lady in the wheel chair, or that large Latino woman who looks like she might be hiding a kangaroo where her FUPA used to be?

3) If I knew that 3 women in this car had full blown AIDS, would I still have intercourse with the chick from thought #1?

4) Which dude would I fuck? Correction: if I had to fuck a dude, I mean, gun to the head, yadda yadda…who would it be?

5) Would I rather put the dick of the dude from thought #4 in my mouth for 10 seconds or go down on kangaroo FUPA Senora for one minute? Yuck.

6) What if the dude from thought #4 is gay, wildly violent, and wants to fuck me?! Andy Dufresne tried to fight ‘em off but couldn’t. I mean, I workout but I don’t know, he’s Asian. What if he knows King Fu or some shit? Damn it. I’d be in trouble.

7) Oh man, girl from thought #1 is getting up and leaving. I wonder if she is going to tell me that she wants to have sex with me when she walks by…

8 ) She’s playing hard to get. Touché.

9) Oh Christ, who farted? Oh wait, that was me. hehe

10) Shit, that was my stop too.