You Feel Naked?

by Big Lou Al Timber on August 7, 2009

seriously

seriously

I’m so angry right now.  I’m so fucking mad I just read this bullshit that I feel like ripping my shirt off ala Hulk Hogan and running through a damn wall. 

“Christina Cimino was logging onto Twitter on Thursday morning when something happened that she found deeply unsettling.’I got some weird error message, and I’m like, ‘What’s going on!?’ the 24-year-old said.

OH MY GOD!!  CHICKEN LITTLE THE SKY IS FUCKING FALLING!

“But for people like Cimino, who said she “felt naked” without access to Twitter, the attacks were a serious reality check.”

“She added: “I was pretty upset, actually. It feels like a lifeline for me … Pretty much everyone knows almost every detail of my life by what I’m doing on Twitter.”

Really?  YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS.  “Near panic?”  Are you out of your damn minds!?!

Let me jot down a few examples of the types of occurances that might cause true ‘near panic.’

* A suicide bomber stepping into the starbucks you’re sitting in and ripping the pin out of his grenade.

* Being 5 months pregnant and waking up in a pool of blood.

* Getting a phone call from your son telling you he’s being held hostage in the jungle in Colombia and this is his last phone call.

* ESPN finding out Albert Pujols actually DID take steriods for the past 7 years.

Those, my friends, might cause near panic.  Waking up to realize you can’t fucking “TWIT” your friends?  Absolutely NOT.  Pick up the goddamn phone you fucking punk.  Write an email like a normal human being!

I am getting an ulcer just thinking about this, I’m panicing now.

WTF!

(oh, and follow us on twitter: www.twitter.com/browtf)

Last 5 posts by Big Lou Al Timber

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