Hold On A Second!

Scranton, the new Oakland

“Exchange Students Live In American Nightmare?”

Are you fucking kidding me? Hold on a second here Drew, seriously. This is absurd.

According to Drew Griffin and Kathleen Johnston, five foreign exchange students came to American for a year and “Lived in (an) American Nightmare,” in Scranton fucking Pennsylvania! Scranton! Guys, Scranton is home to Michael Scott and Jim Halpert. It’s where Pam Beesley answers phones and Dwight Schrute grows beets. The only things nightmare-ish about Scranton, PA are Angela’s cats and Dwight’s brother, Mose. What the fuck are you guys taking about?

“…five young foreign exchange students found themselves caught in a nightmare of neglect, malnourishment and abandonment by those supposed to protect them.”

Ok really? Seriously….prove it.

“Jarbola said some students were so malnourished that one was treated in a hospital for dehydration while another passed out during track at school.”

Alright A) High School kids are malnourished across the country. They eat Doritos and fruit roll-ups. Candy is massive section on their food pyramid.

And B) I would pass out at track practice. I can’t tell you how many friends of mine threw up in trash cans during practice or fainted when they tried to run the mile in 6 minutes. This is standard procedure, get over it!

It get’s even better, Carlos Villarreal, from Colombia, yes COLOMBIA, the country overrun with guerilla warfare and a death rate higher than Compton, had this to say:

“I lost a lot of body weight, and [it was] an unsafe environment which I felt uncomfortable living in, and it was nothing like I had envisioned my experience in America,”

Carlos….WHAT!?! I’ve been to Colombia, scared the fucking shit out of me. I got dysentary, got shot at by terrorists, snorted cocaine off the maid’s ass, and probably should have died when a gang war broke out on the fucking street in front of me. Scranton, PA? NOT COLOMBIA dude.

Give me a break guys, this is still America, land of the free home of the brave. These kids, Carlos in particular, are no different from Perez Hilton pleading for comfort after getting punched in the face because HE called a guy a fag. That’s just ridiculous.