Sean Avery: Suspended for Telling Facts

Bro, WTF!? I thought hockey players were supposed to be tough! Sean Avery gets suspended because he said that fellow hockey player, Dion Phaneuf (jeez, THAT’S a manly name), was having his “sloppy seconds” in regards to dating Elisha Cuthbert. Suspended?! For being awesome?!?!?

All of a sudden Gary Bettman and the Dallas Stars scream bloody murder as if that was out of line. We’re such a bunch of prude fucks in this country! Avery would have been awarded a medal anywhere else. Teammates were saying that Avery crossed the line and he didn’t paint the organization in good light, yadda yadda yadda. WTF? Avery was calling out some ferry who was tagging his ex-girlfriend. Is that not allowed all of a sudden?

Is this Sunday School? No, this is hockey. The sport where you can legally take your gloves off and punch someone in the face repeatedly until he falls down. The sport which robbed a year and a half of hockey from its fans because of money. And now you’re gonna tell me that a guy can’t call out Phaneuf for clearly being the bitch that he is? Did Avery threaten the president? Did he curse on live TV? Did he assault someone? No. Cuthbert is clearly a whore and Avery was just stating the facts for everyone at home. Shouldn’t every kid have the right to know a fact of life? That girls that they fall in love with will eventually turn around a bang some other dude with a girly French name? I guess if Avery had said, “Hey guys, did you know that the sky was blue?”, he should have been suspended too. The logic would be the same.

I’m disgusted at this injustice. Keep doing steroids though guys! It sells more tickets! Let’s just not let kids know that sex and sluts actually exist.