I Want THAT Weed

Zombie

Woody from Cheers has always been a little odd. Wearing hemp tuxedos, learning how to finally jump, and so on. But THIS is a new level of no fucking way. Attacking paparazzi is like beating up the neighbor down the block who A. is a registered sex offender and B. invited your kid in for some candy and wine. Yeah, they are both illegal, but people understand. You really don’t need to come up with an excuse, let alone. . .

“I wrapped a movie called ‘Zombieland,’ in which I was constantly under assault by zombies, then flew to New York, still very much in character,” Harrelson said in a statement issued Friday by his publicist.

“With my daughter at the airport I was startled by a paparazzo, who I quite understandably mistook for a zombie,” he said.

Bro, that is NOT understandable. I could do a movie about robot unicorns who love singing the blues, but when I turned on the radio I wouldn’t be like “those fucking unicorns, at it again”

Just admit you were stoned and pissed off, because I think America, Your daughter, Cliff and Norm, and even that snotty bitch Diane can all agree it’s a lot lower on the “crazy as fuck scale” to hit a paparazzi who is bothering you than saying it was a brain eating zombie. WTF

Oh and CNN, you’re better than that